{so you're telling me he can't drive for how long????}

I am sure most of you already know what happened to our family this past weekend. But for those of you who don't, and for journaling purposes, I will take a minute to write it all down. It all started last Friday. It was Steve's second day on the job as a resident. I got up that day, and took the boys swimming at the water park. We got home at around 3:30, and I quickly gave them bathes, and put them both down for naps. It was around 4:30 that I received a frantic call from one of the resident's Steve works with. He said that I needed to come to the hospital right away. He told me that Steve had suffered a pretty significant seizure while over at the clinic, and was completely out of it. As I later came to find out from the people that were there with him, apparently Steve collapsed, his jaw went rigid, as well as his neck and shoulders, and he started to convulse for close to 3 min. They decided to take him straight over to the ER, and at that time they called me to come in. Obviously that is not the kind of phone call anyone ever wants to receive regarding a loved one.

Immediately panic and fear began to set in. I raced to pull my sleeping boys out of their beds, threw them in the car as fast as I could, and headed to the hospital in a blur of tears. It was only then when I entered the freeway-- that I realized I didn't know what exit to take to get to the hospital. Fear and panic began to set in even more, and I was on the verge of becoming hysterical. Here I was, lost, scared, and worried to death about Steve. I quickly said a little prayer to my Heavenly Father that everything would be ok. Almost immediately a wave of calm washed over me, and I was able to find some clarity and peace. Eventually I found the hospital, and was able to compose myself and remain calm. I was not quite prepared for what I encountered when the two boys and I entered the Emergency Room. Steve was still in the 'postictal phase' and was very confused and drowsy. He was very emotional and kept repeating the same sentences over and over again. It was a bit disturbing to say the least, especially with my kids there. I have to just add how remarkable the staff was to all of us. Their compassion and kindness will forever be appreciated by me. So then, the doctor told me that they wanted to admit him over night for observation, and to run some tests to see if they could figure out what was the cause of this. As we left Steve at the hospital that night, and my boys said goodbye to their daddy--it literally broke my heart to see them so worried and concerned for their father. As you can see from the pic below, they did not want to leave without him.

As I got in my car to leave--that is when the flood of emotion hit me the hardest. As the tears began to flow, my tears this time were for a very different reason. I was filled with an overwhelming all encompassing feeling of gratitude to my Father in Heaven. I realized that Steve's seizure occurred literally 10 min. before he was done for the day, and was about to walk out the door, and get into his car to come home. However, his seizure occurred in a room full of physicians who acted very quickly to get him assistance, instead of on the freeway. My heart was filled with a remarkable love and gratitude, that replaced my fear and worry-- with peace and calm.

When we came back to the hospital the next day, the MRI, head CT and blood work that were performed all came back normal. Which of course was wonderful news. Except for the fact that it didn't explain what was the cause of this episode. Was it triggered by Stress? Fatigue? Who knows. The plan for now is to have Steve follow up with a Neurologist and to have an EEG done. That is when the really challenging news came.......Steve isn't allowed to drive for the next 6 months! What? Are you kidding me? Of course this happens just as he is about to embark on one of the most strenuous and time consuming aspects of residency. Obviously this poses a pretty significant challenge for all of us. I had already prepared myself months ago for the life of a resident's wife, and all that it would require of me. But this really was a lot to swallow. It is easy to let ourselves get overwhelmed by this new challenge, but honestly I feel so blessed and fortunate that I have my husband and that he is safe.

Sometimes it really does take trials and tribulations to put life into perspective, and make you truly appreciate what you have right in front of you. I have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of love and kindness that has been shown to our family over the past few days. The many prayers said on our behalf, concerned phone calls and support mean more to us than you could know. Of course I know challenging times lay ahead, but I am optimistic that we will all take something positive away from this experience.

We didn't really have much of a 4th of July to celebrate. Let's just say between hospital visits, rainy weather, cancelled fireworks and cancelled parades this year due to weather--we basically sat around all weekend, and celebrated the fact that we are together as a family! And that my friends, was just

fine.with.me.

{I did however find time to paint some patriotic toes on, (which my boys got a kick out of) and make our traditional chex mix (which was gone in 2 days) and lit up a few Sparklers.}